How Long Does it Take to Change?
All my clients come to me in order to affect change in their life. But whether it be life coaching, conquering phobias or overcoming writer’s block, the one question that everyone always asks is how long will it take.
In response I always ask my client to clap their hands.
They often pause, unsure as to what significance clapping their hands will be. Usually I have to encourage them a little and say go clap your hands just once. Some people need more encouragement than others, but most people will eventually clap their hands for me.
Once they have clapped I ask two questions: How long did the clap last, and how long did it take before you actually performed the clap. Because change takes the same amount of time as clapping your hands together. One short, sharp clap. A brief instance. That is how long change takes. It is instantaneous, one moment you are in one state the next you have changed. The only question is how long will you hesitate before you make the decision to change?
All change happens instantaneously. The events that lead up to that moment of change maybe be long and arduous. But when the change happens you will be able to point to one specific moment when it happened. One moment you will be the same and the next you will be changed.
Of course what most people are asking is how long will it take to decide to change, how long will they hesitate before committing to the change. But there is only one person who can answer that question. Because there is only one person who can make that decision.
As the old joke goes:
Q. How many therapists does it take to change a light bulb.
A. Only one, but the light bulb must really want to change.
You have prepared the ground by realising that you need to make some change, maybe specifically such as knowing you finally want to over come a particular problem, or more generally wanting a life coach because you know that you are not performing at 100% of your true potential.
I can give you the tools and skills you need to make that change at a fundamental level.